Tuesday, October 13, 2015

#62 Killer Samovar (Poem)

Write about a nonsense, anything you heard or read or came up with yourself. (May Doctor Seuss help you!)
OPTIONAL: Work on your fiction and share.

The Killer Samovar 

Based on true story

I went to the kitchen
The house was asleep
But I wasn’t sleepy -
I fancied something to eat.

I know! 
I should wait till next morning
When all are awake,
But I was so fortunate
To find me some cake.

I opened the fridge,
And there was my beauty.
Jump into my shoes -
What’d be your duty?

“Stop! Do not move!”
I heard a voice from the sky.
And before my response
Something heavy did fly.

It fell on me once,
It fell on me twice,
It fell on me head 
The whole three times.

I could not believe it,
Once I was back on my feet.
You, the pot from my land!
How you dare to contradict?

I rubbed the knob on my head,
Put that heavy thing where it belong,
And stretched arms to my sweetie -
I could not wait for so long!

The vicious attacker 
Flew and struck me once more.
"There’s nothing in the fridge,
Not for you, you moron!"

It fell on me twice,
It fell on me thrice,
It fell on me head
The whole four times.

I stayed down on the floor
Right there on my knees.
The house was asleep,
Not aware of my caprice.

"I want the darn cake!"
I cried (it was loud).
The Samovar stroke me again,
For crying outloud!

It fell on me twice,
It fell one me thrice,
It fell on me head
The whole five times.

Here in my coffin
I’m peacefully now.
In a pretty make up
And my favorite dress with a bow.

“She died for a cake,”
My obituary states.
I’m peaceful… I’m speechless…
The killer escapes.

It fell on me twice,
It fell on me thrice,
It fell on me head
The whole six times.

The moral of this story
Is simple as hell.
Don’t put heavy items of metal
On the upper shelf.

* * *


  1. What a wonderfully humorous way to capture what was a very scary happening. I really do love this poem. It's inspired, to be sure. Another one we should frame and hang ... safely ... in our home.

  2. Oh my! I didn't know what was coming until the end. How clever.